How to tell if somebody is genuinely interested in you/values you, etc. (family, friends, etc.): If you removed all of your effort from the equation would any communication remain between you? If not, there is nothing there and you deserve better.
*This.* If someone hasn't mastered the art of being comfortable by themselves, I'm not interested in anything romantic with that person. It's integral, especially if you've been in a prior relationship. If you haven't made the effort to be complete within yourself, you're cheating both parties within the relationship.