Just living life & accomplishing small routine tasks can become overwhelming when you live with C/PTSD. It's okay to take a break. It's okay to have bad days. This is a normal part of the healing process. It will take time.
Black has always been my favorite color. I always feel indestructible every time I wear black. Black is just the best color ever hands down! I even wanted to paint my room black, at one point, my parents weren't having it though.