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@Sexxyyysammm

For my besties!Funny Friendship Ecard: When I said you were my best friend, I meant that you are the only person on earth who knows almost everything about me and you better keep your whore mouth closed.

When your best friend is pregnant and you realize you won't have kids at the same time as planned. In fact, at your rate hers will babysit yours.

When your best friend is pregnant and you realize you won't have kids at the same time as planned. In fact, at your rate hers will babysit yours. - I don't compete with my friends. I think this idea is really cool if I should have kids.

Holiday cookie swap, my ass. I'd rather have a cocktail swap. Same calories, cleaner kitchen!

Funny Seasonal Ecard: Holiday cookie swap, my ass. I'd rather have a cocktail swap.

Art Im so blessed to have great friends! quotes-and-things-that-make-me-smile

A girl's best friend Haha Funny Friendship Ecard: A good friend brings over a bottle of wine to share. A best friend brings two.

"Kiss my ass! You cheated on me in my dream last night and I'm not over it!"    This sounds like my husband, not me.

when you wake up PISSED. I've definitely woken up mad at the hubs because of something in a dream that he would never do in real life.

Omg... I dealt with it from Sat until Tues.. No more!!! I have dogs that freak and kids trying to stay asleep all night long!!! Ughhh

Funny Seasonal Ecard: This summer, all I want is a day or four where we just sit outside and drink all day, is that too much to ask for? And its gonna happen very soon!

OMG. I shouldn't laugh but I did. #losingmyfeministcard

Anything you can do, I can do better. Unless it's being a whore - you win hands down.

I talk a lot about tequila, drinking and having a good time. I could count on my fingers alone the number of times I've actually had a drink so far this year. (Need the fingers to help me count; sure can't do it in my head... too stoned.) Just kidding. LOL!

Free and Funny Confession Ecard: We're not alcoholics. We generally only drink on the weekends. Except for special occasions. And boredom. And Thursdays. Which some people consider weekends.

This reminds me of Andrew and I love it. Not because he says it.. but because I feel like he would say it to make me laugh

Oh heh.Funny Confession Ecard: I worry that I might be ugly. Then I look in the mirror and am delighted to find that I'm fucking gorgeous.

Funny Picture Dump Of The Day – 55 Pics

If I was dating myself, I would surprise myself with starbucks every morning and it would be adorable. best boyfriend ever.

naughty or nice? lol

Sorry, that's just funny. Nutt this is hilarious think you might find it funny too!

The Three F's Lol!

Funny Reminders Ecard: Remember the 3 F rule. If your not 'F'ucking me 'F'eeding me or 'F'inancing me then your opinions really don't matter! Please keep your opinions to yourself!

Vodka looks like water :-)

Let's workout really hard, then rehydrate with margaritas! Let's workout really hard, then rehydrate with margaritas! Let's workout really hard, then rehydrate with margaritas!

your e cards | Tumblr - love it so true!  hehehe I'd shit if I heard someone else call carmen their best friend.....  I'm sure she has another, but I don't wanna hear it!

Love it so true! I'd shit if I heard someone else call carmen their best friend. I'm sure she has another, but I don't wanna hear it!

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