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I don't like making plans for the day, because then the word 'premeditated' gets thrown around in the courtroom.

If Don't Stop Believin' starts playing and the person you're with doesn't sing along, stop talking to them. You don't need that kind of negativity in your life.oh how I love me some Journey!

We don't have TRENTA here!!!! Why???????????????

Except I don't sleep bc I get the Trenta. I get the Trenta bc I don't sleep.

This is so true and funny

That awkward moment when you realize that you just punished your kid for acting exactly like you. Sorry mini me.

Lol! Been there!

How You Know When You're PMSing a ha ha ha so true. This is more when I wake up from a nap then PMSing. But I'm a girl so it works

My Friend's Daughter Had A School Assignment To Write One Sentence About A Family Member And Draw A Picture About It

My Friend’s Daughter Had A School Assignment To Write One Sentence About A Family Member And Draw A Picture About It

This is a fun part about being a teacher that will come back to bite me when my kids are in school. (The well-meaning daughter who was asked to write a sentence about her mom’s hobbies. 21 Kids Who Sold Out Their Parents)

Last Valentine's Day my brother sent me this and said "this seems like something you would think is funny......."  How my family knows my sense of humor :D

Peggy is a whore. lol, I got this from my friend via email. I lmao. Peggy had many valentine car-: 15 while only had one., Peggy is a where. "Viola doesn't swallow" what are You looking over here for there are green buttons to press


"Because I am a woman, I must make unusual efforts to succeed. If I fail, no one will say "She doesn't have what it takes". They will say "Women don't have what it takes" - Claire Booth Luce


Funny Anniversary Ecard: You're the only one I want to annoy for the rest of my life. I will have to remember this one for our next anniversary


Sketch of a woman and a man, standing in the top panel, woman says "I warn you I'm an animal in bed." In the bottom panel, she's laying down under blankets and saying "Pat my head and bring me food.